You Don’t Have To Have An Eating Disorder To Struggle With Food and Body Image - And You Deserve Help Too

The struggle with food and body image is real. But it doesn’t mean you have to accept it as normal or OK.

**Disclaimer: Please note that the information in this or any other blog posts on this site may not be suitable or apply to you, depending on where you’re at in your mental health and/or eating disorder/diet recovery journey. This information is for educational purposes only and not meant to be a substitute for medical or psychiatric advice. Please consult your healthcare practitioner before making any changes. See full disclaimer here.​​

When there’s a conversation about food, dieting or body image, often I’ll hear something like, “Well I don’t have an eating disorder - I’m not totally starving myself or that extreme! I just watch what I eat and exercise to be healthy, like everyone else.” Though that statement may be true in some cases, more often than not, if probed a little further, there’s usually some underlying inner struggle with food and body image, that is simply justified as “normal”. I don’t blame anyone for thinking these things, though. Because unfortunately we live in a society that has normalized disordered eating behaviours and body bashing. So being able to even detect if your eating behaviours are a problem is getting harder and harder to do.

What we typically think of as an “eating disorder”, that is, Anorexia Nervosa (AN), Bulimia Nervosa (BN) and Binge Eating Disorder (BED), have relatively low lifetime prevalence rates of 0.9%, 1.5% and 3.5% in women respectively, and even lower rates in men . Though they are very serious illnesses with the highest mortality rate of any mental illness, and proper treatment and care should be a priority for those affected - for the purposes of this blog post, I’m going to focus on those who are struggling with food and body image that don’t fit into any eating disorder diagnosis.

Take these staggering statistics: In 2008, ScienceDaily reported on a detailed online survey done by the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, that was completed by 4,023 American women, ages 25-45, and the main finding was that seventy-five percent of respondents reported disordered eating behaviours or symptoms consistent with eating disorders, such as induced vomiting or taking laxatives or diet pills (31%), regularly skipping meals (37%), cutting out entire food groups (26%), eating 1,000 calories or less a day (16%), and smoking (13%), all for the purpose of trying to lose weight. Moreover, thirty-nine percent of women said that what they eat or weigh interfere with their happiness and twenty-seven percent would be “extremely upset” if they gained just five pounds.
  
And disordered eating behaviours don’t just belong to women. According to a 2014 cross-sectional study, binge eating, purging, and extreme dieting practices are increasingly being reported by men as well. Probably the most disturbing statistics I found on body image was from The Dove Global Beauty and Confidence Report, released in 2016, involving interviews with 10,500 females across thirteen countries: Eighty-five percent of women surveyed reported avoiding important life activities when they don’t feel good about how they look, and eighty-seven percent of women will restrict food or put their health at risk to boost their body-esteem. Interestingly, sixty percent of women reported that they felt they needed to meet certain beauty standards portrayed by the media, while seventy-seven percent agreed it was important to be their own person and not necessarily conform.

What do all these statistics mean? The struggle is real. You don’t have to have a diagnosed eating disorder to be struggling with eating and body image. In fact, the majority of women and increasingly men, ARE struggling. You really don’t have to search too deep to recognize this. Behaviours such as body-talk (i.e. criticizing your body or someone else’s body) or diet-talk (i.e. talking about calories or macros, dieting, or supplement trends) are now common topics of discussion either with family, friends, or colleagues. Making food choices are often based in dichotomous thinking, i.e. either “good” or “bad”, or “healthy” or “unhealthy”, or “fattening” or “not fattening”. And the number on the scale or the size of one’s pants can highly influence how one feels about their worth as a person, and/or how one is treated by others. There is so much fat-phobia in our society, no wonder it feels “normal” to be afraid of being fat or getting fat. And to be able to justify disordered eating habits as “normal” or even “healthy”.

Am I saying that everyone who has ever dieted has disordered eating and is struggling? No. But I would argue that dieting is a form of disordered eating, and the more you engage in it, the more likely your habits and feelings will become more disordered and harmful, and the more likely you will continue to struggle. And the more you believe that your worth and value as a person is determined by your body size or shape, the more you will struggle.  

How can you determine if your relationship with food and your body is disordered or possibly harmful to your health? Here are some questions to ask yourself:

Is the amount of food you eat and what you eat based on an intention to lose weight or a fear of gaining weight?
 
Do you believe that being fat or in larger body is unhealthy or bad and that anyone (including yourself) should be able to be in a thinner body if they just try hard enough?

Do you hold back on pursuing things that are important to you (i.e. relationships, jobs, hobbies, travelling, going to the beach, physical activity) because you either feel uncomfortable or shameful in your body?

Do you believe that if you lose weight you’ll be happier and healthier?

Do you try really hard to maintain your current weight, in fear of gaining weight and/or being unhealthy?

Do you jump from one diet trend to the next, hoping you will find the “right” one that will finally get you “results” and make you feel great?

Do you feel guilty or ashamed when you eat certain foods or eat too much of certain foods?

Do you believe that the main purpose of exercise is to burn calories, lose weight, or look a certain way?

Do you frequently criticize your appearance and/or think a lot about wanting one or several body parts to be different?

Do you often wish you could have your “old” body back and feel frustrated that your current eating and exercising habits are not giving you the results you believe you could have?
  
If you answered yes to any of these, it is possible that you are suffering from unhealthy or disordered eating practices, and negative body image. This is not a diagnostic tool or assessment. These are just some common behaviours that I’ve observed (and been through myself during my own recovery) of those that struggle with food and body image. And these are often behaviours I hear about from those that claim that they don’t have something as “extreme” as an eating disorder, but that these are just “normal” ways to be with food and your body in today's world.

I would agree, but just because something is common and accepted in society, doesn’t mean that it’s “normal” or that is has to be. And I’m not trying to say that something is wrong or pathological with you if you are engaging in any of these thoughts or behaviours about food and your body. Trying to live happily and survive in a thin and health-obsessed society has led to a normalization of diet and body obsession. And because most diets fail in the long run, but the thin ideal still prevails, the struggle with food and body image persists. So this is not your fault. Nothing is wrong with you. These struggles are simply a product of a disordered eating society and systems.

The message I want you to take from this post, is that if you can relate to struggling with food and your body image, even if it doesn’t seem that “extreme”, is that nothing is wrong with you. But you don’t have to struggle. You don’t have to accept that these behaviours are “normal”. And know that it’s possible to change your relationship with food and your body for the better. Even though the obsession with thinness and dieting doesn’t seem to be going away anytime soon, it IS possible for you to find peace with food and your body. It’s not necessarily an easy journey, but there is help and you deserve to get help.

Bottom line: If your relationship with food and/or your body is getting in the way of you living a meaningful and happy life, know that you don’t have to settle for that. You deserve better.

Where do you start? It always depends and I cannot give specific treatment advice in a blog post, since treatment is always individualized from person to person. I can suggest though, starting to educate yourself on the Intuitive Eating and the Health At Every Size® principles.
I also have a huge list of eating disorder/diet recovery, and body positive resources, including books, podcasts, blogs and social media accounts to follow here. You can also seek help and guidance from practitioners who specialize in eating and body image concerns, such as dietitians, psychologists or psychotherapists.

The world of food, dieting, and body image is very confusing and overwhelming. There is no shame in getting help and support to help you through. I do what I do because I believe that no one should have to put their lives on hold or suffer due to food and body image concerns.

Are you struggling with eating and body image concerns?
​Learn more about my psychotherapy & counselling services, and how I can help you here.
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